Sometimes, it’s really hard for us to live in such a demanding world, full of unrealistic expectations. It starts from small things, like when you spend the whole day cleaning your house and when you finally sit down at the end of the day, you get mad at yourself because you didn’t have time to put your closet in order as well. Later, it gets bigger – you just gave birth to the most beautiful girl, and you realized that at least once in her life, some stupid guy is going to break her heart – and you’re feeling scared. The list goes on, and on. And this endless list can often feel like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel no matter what we do or what we achieve.
But we don’t have to feel this way.
First of all, take a deep breath. Evict all the negative thoughts from your head just for a second and memorize what I am going to say now: it is in our nature to always crave for bigger things. We always want more, and we are never fully satisfied.
Know that there is nothing wrong with you for feeling this way. There is nothing wrong with ambition, drive or even setting goals for yourself. Without any of these, we would not grow or prosper. But it’s also important to find a healthy and happy medium that encourages the growth without leaving us feeling nervous or anxious anymore.
When your past calls, don’t answer.
Just ask yourself: why are you regretting something that has already happened? How can you know if you would be happier right now in this moment if you accepted that blind date 5 years ago? There is no convenient time machine you can just slip into when you need to correct some error along the way. Chances are you will never know how things could have turned out, which is why beating yourself over it is just destructive. While you may not like some of the turns your life has taken, spending less time dwelling on the whys enables you to work in the here and now.
You will rise by lifting others
Being able to selflessly help others is a very powerful thing, and has the bonus of giving you a boost of confidence. There are many ways you can help someone. You can look into a charity and help those in need with clothes, food, money, and even your time. Or volunteering at schools to help guide the future generation. If you have your own children, even better. Teach them how important it is to be frugal. For example, show them that, with a little bit of online research, they can find great deals on clothes for children that is high-quality and their kids will love wearing it. Not only have your children learned a great lesson, but you will also feel incredibly fulfilled.
Emotions are temporary states of mind.
People tend to mistake being content with being happy all the time. The real meaning of contentment is being able and free to express every single emotion, but yet not allowing it to leave a permanent mark on you. If you are happy – jump around and sing your throat out. If you are angry – let it all out loud (without it being destructive of course), if you are sad – don’t be scared to cry. Sadness is not the sign of weakness – it is a form of bravery, just like any other emotion.
Comparison is the thief of joy
These are very powerful words said by Theodore Roosevelt. You should NEVER compare yourself to other people, it will only cause damage to your mind. The size of your neighbor’s house, the wage of your sister, the perfect relationship of your best friend and her boyfriend/husband is not your problem! You can’t change other people’s situations, and know that there is always going to be someone who has a better (or worse) life than you. Maybe that best friend of yours is jealous because you have 2 children while she has none? Maybe that sister wants to have a family like yours, but she can’t because she’s working too much? You will never know, and you should never care.
Treat yourself honey! Of course, money can’t fulfill our psychological needs such as to feel loved, secure and good at what we do, but it can sometimes erase that color blue from our faces, right? Remember, you are a strong, working woman. If you want to treat yourself to that fancy coat you’ve had your eye on for a while now then why not. Want to take that lifelong trip to Macchu Picchu than by all means go for it. Treating yourself to a good pampering ever so often, is essential to you enjoying the fruits of your labor.